Last Saturday was one of those crisp and sunny fall days that you just have to be outside. Zlatina, her boyfriend, Kevin, and I were in Sozopol, a quaint coastal village half an hour south of Burgas. We were enjoying a lazy stroll, when we got hungry. Zlatina and I wanted to indulge our sweet teeth, so we persuaded Kevin to stop by a cafe and get some coffee and baklava or some other kind of pastry.
There we were, looking at the cakes and pastries in the display case. True to my nature, I first looked at the gelatos. However, I noticed that most of the gelato had crusted over, the way it gets when you thaw it and then refreeze it, completely unappetizing. I wasn’t that desperate for gelato, so I moved to the display case with cakes. They looked fresh; there were five or six chocolate ones. I was trying to decide which of them , when I saw the server putting a new kind in. Here’s a translation of our conversation.
Oberonbg (excitedly pointing to the cake): Ohh, what is this?
Server: Which one?
Oberonbg: What you just put in.
Server (looking supremely uninterested): A cake.
Oberonbg (a bit annoyed): Well, yes, yes. But what kind?
Server: A chocolate one.
Oberonbg: Yes, I can see that. But what kind of chocolate cake? What is it called?
Server (righteously indignant): Well, I don’t know! It might be Vienna or not.
By this point I had become thoroughly nonplussed, almost as though I were stuck in an ersatz Abbott and Costello skit. Zlatina wanted to be helpful and stepped in.
Zlatina: So, if we want to order some, what do we call it?
Even after this helpful explication of my questions, the server continued to regard us with a sour disposition. However, she did proffer the following “answer”:
Server: Well, I’ve only been here a week and don’t yet the names.
Zlatina and I: ?! ….?!
Server (with a tone one reserves for addressing 7-year olds): Well, in any case, you have to order here at the display case, so you can just point.
We did not eat there. Instead we went to a joint right on the promenade, overlooking the sea, where we were the only customers, not because it wasn’t good, but because such is Sozopol in the winter–halfway to a ghost town. I had a delicious fish soup, delicately flavored with lovage. The waiter was attentive and seemed more comfortable with English than the average Bulgarian. I think our food was better than what we would’ve got from the sour server, who couldn’t be bothered to learn the names of a few cakes.